max abelson's super groovy music video spectacular

1960s on mon
1970s on tues
1980s on wed
1990s on thurs
2000s on fri


featuring the fine musical stylings of: the beatles, the rolling stones, serge gainsbourg, yo la tengo, the kinks, harry nilsson, ike & tina turner, antony, aretha franklin, wilco, elvis, talking heads, stephen foster, dr. dre, bonnie 'prince' billy, elvis c., neil young, the smiths, dusty springfield, al green, jimi hendrix, r.e.m., ray charles, belle & sebastian, randy newman, cat power, the cure, queen & pavement


i write for the observer, email me at mabelson at observer.com


"mtv makes me want to smoke crack." -beck


see the archives, or a random post.


"i just happen to be here, and it's okay." -caetano veloso


"it took me about three or four weeks to toilet train my cat, nightlife. most of the time is spent moving the box very gradually to the bathroom. do it very slowly and don't confuse him." -charles mingus


"sing a simple song but keep the swing strong." -de la soul


"his wife was a spent piece of used jet trash, made good bloody marys, kept her mouth shut most of the time, had a chihuahua named carlos that had some kind of skin disease and was totally blind." -tom waits


"i’ve still got things inside me—sad things, happy things—that people don’t know about." -loretta lynn


"after cheesecake with all of your friends and family, who's gonna front the bill? me... say you want to take first-class trips, well i want to work those first-class hips. yes i do." -r. kelly


"i drive a rolls-royce, cause it's good for my voice." -t.rex


gotta think straight, keep a clean plate." -joanna newsom


"keep a clean nose, watch the plain clothes." -bob dylan


"my mother used to tell me about vibrations. i didn't really understand too much of what that meant when i was just a boy. to think that invisible feelings, invisible vibrations existed scared me to death." -brian wilson


"i'll be the wind, the rain and the sunset." -lou reed


"hey there, hey now, well, you can make a pacemaker blink, yeah, easy thing, make a man's heart go bibbity bom like a gentle drum: dirty ass rock and roll. -john cale


"i'm dealing in rock and roll. i'm not a bonafide human being." -phil spector


"at a certain point phil approached me with a bottle of kosher red wine in one hand and a .45 in the other, put his arm around my shoulder and shoved the revolver into my neck and said, 'leonard, i love you.' i said, 'i hope you do, phil.'" -leonard cohen


"we were having coffee or something to drink, i forget, at 2 am at the plaza hotel. phil had this long hair, down to his shoulders, he’s a very strange looking guy, it’s, well, anyway, this was before longish hair was everywhere, it goes back. i could see at this table nearby, there were two couples, i remember, they were older people, at least in the 60s, they’d whisper at each other and look at phil and whisper at each other. finally this lady, tanked, comes over to phil and says, 'alright, sonny, what’s your problem?' and he said, 'premature ejaculation, what’s yours?'" -tom wolfe


"i bite my nails and if that fails i go get myself stoned, but when i do i think of you and head myself back home" -gram parsons


woody allen's reasons to live: "i would say groucho marx, to name one thing, and willie mays, and the second movement of the jupiter symphony, and louis armstrong’s recording of potatohead blues, swedish movies, naturally. sentimental education by flaubert, marlon brando, frank sinatra, those incredible apples and pears by cézanne, the crabs at sam wo’s, tracy’s face."


"i'm going to boogie my scruples away" -lowell george


"the first time i got stoned on grass was with john paul jones of led zeppelin. we'd been talking to ramblin' jack elliott somewhere and jonesy said to me, 'come over and i'll turn you on to grass.' he had a huge room with nothing in it except this huge vast hammond organ, right next door to the police. i ate two loaves of bread. then the telephone rang. jonesy said, answer that for me will you? so i went downstairs to answer the phone and kept on walking right out into the street." -david bowie


brian eno songs that will make good book titles for my 10-volume memoir, in order: here he comes, baby's on fire, golden hours, brutal ardour, taking tiger mountain, events in dense fog, through hollow lands, some of them are old, everything merges with the night, dead finks don’t talk


ry cooder albums that every man should own: into the purple valley, boomer's story, paradise and lunch


#1 song on the white album (tie): long long long, happiness is a warm gun


"the only word is love." -john lennon


thelonious monk's middle name: sphere


"think about something else. was art tatum talented?" -charles aznavour in shoot the piano player


"really, we don't want people twiddling their goatees over our stuff" -radiohead


"i don't rap fast, i rap slow, 'cause i mean every letter in the words in the sentences of my quotes." -lil' wayne


"i love songs about horses, railroads, land, judgment day, family, hard times, whiskey, courtship, marriage, adultery, separation, murder, war, prison, rambling, damnation, home, salvation, death, pride, humor, piety, rebellion, patriotism, larceny, determination, tragedy, rowdiness, heartbreak and love. and mother. and god." -johnny cash


"the moon is clear, the sky is bright, i'm happy as the horse's shite." -the pogues


"i hope that you all out there, young, old, tall, short, fat or thin, quick or slow, no matter what kind or color or shape or person you are, if you like to make music, why, go ahead, don't let the microphones and loudspeakers faze you, make some yourself.” -pete seeger


"but chuck berry isn't merely the greatest of the rock and rollers, or rather, there's nothing mere about it. say rather that unless we can somehow recycle the concept of the great artist so that it supports chuck berry as well as it does marcel proust, we might as well trash it altogether." -robert christgau


mashable.com says about the spectacular: "you can expect the unexpected with this awesome gem. groovy."


the 33 1/3 book series' blog says: "whenever i start playing around on youtube i always end up watching that lady fall over while stomping grapes, so it's nice to have someone steer me in a more worthwhile direction."


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2008: j. f. m. a. m. j. j. a. s. o. n. d.


2009: j. f. m. a. m. j. j. a. s. o. n. d.


2010: j. f.


Creative Commons License
March 2

#540: elvis costello - watching the detectives and you belong to me (1979)

i’m awfully excited about my cover story in tomorrow’s observer about the sad limbo that private equity prince steven rattner has been suffering through lately. while i was writing the article, i couldn’t help but think about the incredibly slight physical resemblance between mr. rattner and elvis costello & the attractions’ bassist bruce thomas. frankly, that would get me thinking about lots of costello-related topics, especially, as it happens, the time he started an all-lady new wave dance party on stage by telling the crowd, “now, we think there’s rather too many tall people in the audience, so the young ladies in the audience can’t see all that well. and what we want all those guys to do is move away from the front here, so all the girls can come down front.” actually, now that i think about it, the bassist and investor don’t really look alike. but who’s really counting.

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November 9
“right now i believe everything will be alright if we all get our minds together. we’ve got to think about exactly what’s about to happen.” - lightnin’ hopkins (1964)

“right now i believe everything will be alright if we all get our minds together. we’ve got to think about exactly what’s about to happen.” - lightnin’ hopkins (1964)

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September 16
“just remember different people have peculiar tastes/ and the glory of love, the glory of love, the glory of love might see you through.” - lou reed

“just remember different people have peculiar tastes/ and the glory of love, the glory of love, the glory of love might see you through.” - lou reed

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August 3
“my mother used to tell me about vibrations. i really didn’t understand too much what that meant when i was a boy. it scared me, the word vibrations. to think that invisible feelings, invisible vibrations existed, scared me to death.” - brian wilson

“my mother used to tell me about vibrations. i really didn’t understand too much what that meant when i was a boy. it scared me, the word vibrations. to think that invisible feelings, invisible vibrations existed, scared me to death.” - brian wilson

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June 24

#398: big daddy kane - smooth operator (1989)

instead of apologizing for his long and beautiful affair with “a dear, dear friend from argentina,” governor mark sanford should have just been like, “girlfriend, you’ve been scooped like ice cream, so just swing or fling a gathering, try to cling, because it’s a big daddy thing. and i’m loving them, right, word is bond, so just play marvin gaye and let’s get it on… when it comes to this there’s none greater! sincerely yours, the smooth operator.”

on the other hand he does get points for actually saying, and i transcribed this myself during the press conference, “i would never say, ‘yo, i’m completely right with my heart.’”

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February 13
“well, an inebriated good evening to you all. welcome to raphael’s silver cloud lounge. slip me a little crimson, jimson, give me the low down, brown, i want some scoop, betty boop, i’m on my way into town… i’m so god damn horny that the crack of dawn better be careful around me… i used to know a girl, yeah, and it was a hubba hubba and ding ding ding, i said, ‘baby, you got everything.’ a week later it was a hubba hubba and ding ding dong, baby it sure didn’t last too long. i know things are tough all over, ain’t getting any better… i’ve been playing night clubs and staying out all night long, come home late, gone for three months, come back and everything in the refrigerator turns into a science project. so you get designs on a waitress you know. she got three or four kids, she’s sorting out her checks and she’s counting out her change. you say, ‘hey baby, heat me up a bearclaw on the radar range.’ well, and then it gets real cold.” - tom waits, nighthawks at the diner opening introduction, 1975.

“well, an inebriated good evening to you all. welcome to raphael’s silver cloud lounge. slip me a little crimson, jimson, give me the low down, brown, i want some scoop, betty boop, i’m on my way into town… i’m so god damn horny that the crack of dawn better be careful around me… i used to know a girl, yeah, and it was a hubba hubba and ding ding ding, i said, ‘baby, you got everything.’ a week later it was a hubba hubba and ding ding dong, baby it sure didn’t last too long. i know things are tough all over, ain’t getting any better… i’ve been playing night clubs and staying out all night long, come home late, gone for three months, come back and everything in the refrigerator turns into a science project. so you get designs on a waitress you know. she got three or four kids, she’s sorting out her checks and she’s counting out her change. you say, ‘hey baby, heat me up a bearclaw on the radar range.’ well, and then it gets real cold.” - tom waits, nighthawks at the diner opening introduction, 1975.

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January 5
“i heard of a man who says words so beautifully that if he only speaks their name women give themselves to him.” (from let us compare mythologies)

“i heard of a man who says words so beautifully that if he only speaks their name women give themselves to him.” (from let us compare mythologies)

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+
“my reputation as a ladies’ man was a joke. it caused me to laugh bitterly through the ten thousand nights i spent alone. from a third-story window above the parc du portugal i’ve watched the snow come down all day. as usual there’s no one here.” (from book of longing)

“my reputation as a ladies’ man was a joke. it caused me to laugh bitterly through the ten thousand nights i spent alone. from a third-story window above the parc du portugal i’ve watched the snow come down all day. as usual there’s no one here.” (from book of longing)

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November 14
did you know lil’ wayne’s dedication 3 is streaming for free on dj drama’s website? if you haven’t heard, lil’ wayne is like the beatles, just with more sex and less love: on d3 he says, “your girlfriend is into them gangsters/ and me being a gangster, i get into your girlfriend/  i stay still when the world spins,” which is only half as good as the mind-boggling profanity of, “your girl blessed me/ she sucked my dick/ and i sneezed.”

did you know lil’ wayne’s dedication 3 is streaming for free on dj drama’s website?

if you haven’t heard, lil’ wayne is like the beatles, just with more sex and less love: on d3 he says, “your girlfriend is into them gangsters/ and me being a gangster, i get into your girlfriend/  i stay still when the world spins,” which is only half as good as the mind-boggling profanity of, “your girl blessed me/ she sucked my dick/ and i sneezed.”

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November 4
“ for the rest of her senate campaign and for her presidential race, we instituted strict controls to ensure that every song at a clinton event had been vetted, both lyrically and rhythmically. fail-safe devices were put in place. committees of jurisdiction and oversight formed. rythmically-vetting strategist howard wolfson in today’s times.
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October 23
“ ms. lakshmi, current host of bravo’s top chef and now-estranged age inappropriate wife of insipid singer-songwriter salman rushdie, had been replaced by katie lee joel, former host of bravo’s top chef and not-yet-estranged age inappropriate wife of fatwa’d post-colonial novelist billy joel. jon liu, blowing everyone’s (new york state of) mind in the nyo
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October 8
reviewing neil diamond’s 1972 album hot august night, robert christgau wrote, “it’s obvious that the man is some sort of genius rock entertainer, but for the most part the great entertainer is striving for bad art and not even achieving it. the humor here is almost as sententious as the phony canta libre and the country-western parodies might get a poorer, drunker man lynched.”

reviewing neil diamond’s 1972 album hot august night, robert christgau wrote, “it’s obvious that the man is some sort of genius rock entertainer, but for the most part the great entertainer is striving for bad art and not even achieving it. the humor here is almost as sententious as the phony canta libre and the country-western parodies might get a poorer, drunker man lynched.”

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October 1

#218: the smiths - this charming man (1983)

morrisey, the only non-fictional character to ever have so much handsomeness and angst, once said, “i found that on those very rare occasions when i did get invited anywhere, i would constantly sit down and say: ‘good heavens, i couldn’t possibly go to this place tonight because i don’t have any clothes… i don’t have any shoes.’ so i’d miss out on all those foul parties. it was really quite a blessing in disguise.”

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September 30
if god is love and love is blind and ray charles was blind, then god is a man with a backup band whose best-of collection featured seven flight attendants on its cover. marinate on that for a while.

if god is love and love is blind and ray charles was blind, then god is a man with a backup band whose best-of collection featured seven flight attendants on its cover. marinate on that for a while.

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September 23
“ inside, outside, willy sends them silly/ with his starshine shimmy shuffle smile. (the sweet goes for sweet iambic pentameter.)
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